Celebrating Valentine’s Day, in every season of life - Episode 90
Valentine’s Day can bring about a whole mix of emotions, from happy and flirty to stressed or even lonely. On this episode of Create & Consume, I’m unpacking the many versions of Valentine’s Day I’ve experienced.
I was single for 22 years before meeting Andrew, so I’ve celebrated this holiday in just about every way possible.
Whether you’re single, dating, married, heartbroken, or somewhere in between, love is always worth celebrating.
Not all love is romantic love and you get to create your own adventure based on the season you’re in.
Create & Consume:
What Austen is creating this week: a reel with romance novel recommendations if you need any this month!
What Austen is consuming this week: the most boring Super Bowl in recent memory, with one of the coolest halftime shows in recent memory
In this episode:
A brief history of Valentine’s Day
While visions of glittery cards from Hallmark may come to mind, Valentine’s Day actually dates back to ancient Rome.
In mid-February, Romans celebrated a festival centered on fertility, spring, and matchmaking.
In the third century, the Catholic Church honored a priest named Valentine who, according to legend, secretly performed marriages after they were banned by Emperor Claudius II, who believed single men made better soldiers.
Valentine was executed on February 14, and over time, that date became associated with love.
By the Middle Ages, poets like Geoffrey Chaucer linked the day to romance.
By the 1700s, handwritten love notes were being exchanged, eventually evolving into the card-filled holiday we recognize today.
So yes—it’s commercial now.
But it’s also layered with history, storytelling, and centuries of shifting meaning.
The single girl era
Being single on Valentine’s Day? It’s a vibe. There’s freedom. There’s possibility.
There’s no compromising on what you want to eat, watch, or do.
You don’t have to wait for someone else to make your life feel magical—you can do that yourself.
Solo date ideas
Take yourself out to dinner or drinks (sit at the bar, bring a book… just maybe not on the 14th).
Order your favorite takeout and romanticize your space—twinkle lights, candles, cozy decor.
Plan a full solo weekend (I share a detailed itinerary in Episode 14: The Perfect Solo Weekend).
That might include:
Journaling and vision boarding
Treating yourself to your favorite coffee
Going on a long walk
Visiting a museum
Reading a fun book
Writing a letter to your future self
If your relationship status is “it’s complicated”
Maybe you’re in a situationship, long-distance, navigating a breakup or grieving a loss.
First: protect your peace. That might mean staying offline for a few days or skipping the holiday entirely and hanging with friends instead.
Focus on clarity, not aesthetics. Valentine’s Day is not more important than your emotional well-being.
Galentine’s Day: celebrating your friendships
Friendships have their own love stories so be sure to treat them well. As Carrie Bradshaw said, “maybe we’re each other’s soulmates.”
The concept of Galentine’s Day became iconic thanks to our girl Leslie Knope of Parks and Recreation, but the sentiment is timeless: show up for your people.
Cozy vibes
Vision boarding
Movie night with snacks, takeout, and pajamas
GNO energy
A group dinner reservation
Themed cocktail bar night or brunch
Trying a class together—cooking, Pilates, pottery
Romantic love may dominate the marketing, but friendship love is just as worthy of celebration.
Valentine’s Day in a relationship or marriage
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be expensive or over-the-top.
Thoughtful beats flashy every time.
I’m so grateful for Andrew, and I try to show appreciation year-round rather than relying on one day to carry all the weight.
Our first Valentine’s Day together was in 2018 at Cheeseboat, which is usually a quiet spot in Brooklyn but they hired a DJ for the night.
Since then, we’ve tried different dinners out and ultimately realized that a 2/14 restaurant reservation isn’t really our vibe.
Here’s what I love instead:
Handwritten cards (if nothing else, give me a heartfelt card)
Recreating your first date—or revisiting the neighborhood where it happened
Cooking dinner together (if one cooks, the other handles drinks, music, ambiance)
Making a “memory timeline” of your relationship (even if the craft attempt turns out hilariously bad like mine did)
Unconventional ideas
Paint night at home or working on a puzzle
Having a long conversation about your future
Planning a big trip together
Playing connection-based games like We’re Not Really Strangers or Get Closer
The point isn’t perfection. It’s intention.
Valentine’s TV watch list
If staying in is more your speed, here are some comfort-watch episodes to match the mood:
The Office – “Valentine’s Day”
Parks and Recreation – “Galentine’s Day” and “Operation Ann”
Modern Family – “My Funky Valentine”
Glee – “Silly Love Songs”
30 Rock – “St. Valentine’s Day” / “Anna Howard Shaw Day”
Gilmore Girls – “A Vineyard Valentine”
Gossip Girl – “It Happened One Night” & “Crazy Cupid Love”
New Girl – “Valentine’s Day”
There’s something comforting about watching fictional chaos unfold while you’re cozy on the couch.
Summary
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to look one specific way to be meaningful. Whether you’re single, navigating something complicated, celebrating friendships, or building a life with a partner, there is love available to you in this season.
Instead of chasing a picture-perfect version of the holiday, focus on intention over aesthetics and connection over performance. Romanticize the life you’re living right now—because every chapter deserves to be celebrated.
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